I have no idea when prom and all the required accoutrements turned into the soul-sucking big deal that it's become, but I really need the person responsible for this to smack themselves upside the head. And do it hard, REAL HARD.
I thought finding The Dress would be the last big battle in this war on my sanity. I should have known. And no, the PBS (prom bullsh*t) isn't emanating from DD. It's coming mostly from other parents. The fact that this surprises me is proof I shouldn't be allowed to handle sharp objects.
Prom is Friday night, with After Prom immediately following--in a different location. As if the kids can't/won't make a side trip to Trouble on the way to After Prom. Fine. Nice. Whatever. I understand the reasoning behind all of this; they're trying to keep our kids safe. The idea is to keep the kids corralled in one place so they don't spend the night drinking, smoking pot, and having S. E. X. I guess they want them to do something different for a change. But here's the kicker--I got the email LAST NIGHT that they need parent volunteers for After Prom. DH volunteered our services two months ago and not a single person got back to him, which led me to believe they have all the volunteers they need (further confirmation about my sharp object theory). I'll just fast forward to the insult-to-injury part: the parent volunteers are expected to wear a uniform--a white shirt and black pants. They don't want the kids to be confused about who we are and why we're in the school gym with them at four o'clock in the morning. Yeah, the kids are going to take one look at us in our white shirts and black pants and say, "Whoa! How can I even think of S. E. X and D. R. U. G. S. when my parents are wearing black and white? No, I'm going to follow the straight and narrow path because a uniform means somebody is being serious! Subliminally, they remind me of cops!"
How about this: instead of worrying that our kids are smoking doobies and doing the Big Nasty, why don't we give them ways to deal with the tremendous stress they're under right now? HELLO. The time to begin dealing with S. E. X and D. R. U. G. S was about eighteen years ago. In the real world, that horse probably left the barn a long time ago--have you checked your kid's facebook page lately? Meanwhile, our kids are reminded on a daily basis that if they don't get top grades and get into the best schools they are doomed, and oh by the way, they should probably work on curing cancer, the current financial debacle, and global warming, in between studying for finals and doing volunteer work at a homeless shelter. But hey, no pressure! So what if we threw you into the deep end of the pool before we taught you to swim. You're smart, you can deal with it. Besides, your parents will be wearing a white shirt and black pants. How awesome is that!
*Yes, I realize this rant isn't really about Prom, but academic stress isn't a four letter word, unless you're talking about Math, which for me IS a four letter word.
Ha! I was way too punk rock to go to something so "conformist" as prom. It had nothing to do with the fact that no one asked me out.ReplyDelete
I think the bigger pressure is that you're "supposed to" have sex at prom. So there's a huge mixed message of get laid but don't really do it!
And don't get me started on how meaningless a college diploma has become. It was sickening how many of my classmates were barely literate and yet graduated from college and are now in grad school. Most of them are also now teachers. *shudder*
It always surprises me that parents think that there isn't sex and drugs before prom. Kids get into plenty of trouble pre-prom. My friends and I just did prom for the pics then went out for coffee.ReplyDelete
I am right with you about offering help and only being taken up on it last minute. That drives me crazy!
Vanessa--I am just getting started on the whole literacy thing! Stay tuned!ReplyDelete
Elsbeth--yeah, that last minute crap is working my nerves. I'm sure there's more to come!
And THANK YOU for summarizing all of the reasons in one post why I am so deathly afraid of having children that I am NOT. You are most brave!!!ReplyDelete
This is what I have to look forward to? Oh goodness....Good thing Mike will be at my side. He is more patient AND sane than I am.ReplyDelete
Shauna--don't worry. By the time Tilly is prom age, they'll have virtual prom. She won't even have to leave the house.ReplyDelete
You are making me seriously fear for my future. (And also, I chose to go to the local Renaissance Faire over attending my senior prom, so I REALLY don't understand why prom is such a big deal. . .)ReplyDelete
Do the parents really need to dress like baseball umpires in order to have credibility on this particular night? Even with professional hair and make-up, I doubt I could look like a teenager three years from now when my daughter is a junior. Good grief, I haven't even been carded at the grocery store since the Clinton Administration.ReplyDelete
LMAO. Thank God your daughter has YOU for a mom instead of a cabbagehead-blackandwhite-wearing-clueless-idiot.ReplyDelete
black and white. That's too much. Prom. I will keep my hopes up for virtual prom.ReplyDelete
Too much pressure on kids. That's going to be a button with me too.
When my dad gave me a curfew that I thought was unreasonable, I used to say "Anything that you think I am doing after 10:00, I could be doing before, you know" - which never helped me win any arguments for a later curfew, but I always thought was a good comeback.ReplyDelete
I don't get the after-prom thing - it's at the school? In the gym? What's to stop any 17 year old with a brain in their head from skipping that part and going to find their own fun? What's fun about the gym? I might be missing the point here (I haven't experienced a public school prom yet(or grad as they call it in Calgary)
2 nights out of the whole school year (post prom, Post grad) there is feigned concern about what children maybe doing when left to their own devices. The other 363, you're on your own kids.ReplyDelete
Couldn't the parents just wear a stick on name tag or something?! I mean I didn't finish college, but I would think that would be easier. Why did they think asking for volunteers 2 days before the event is sufficient?! Havent they been vomiting up prom this & that for months? And YES I agree that the stress on kids is ridiculous. And I'm pretty sure we learned about drugs & the big nasty WAY before prom! Geez! (Math is definately a 4 letter word in my book) Hope your after prom duties go smoothly :)ReplyDelete
Virtual prom sounds awesome! ha ha
At least its almost over?ReplyDelete