Tuesday, June 14, 2011


Most people who read my blog are knitters and crocheters, so you get what I'm about to tell you. For my non-fiber followers, I'm probably not talking to you. If you follow this blog, you most likely "get it" or are at least polite enough to act like you do. For that, I thank you. For everybody else...

Knitting is NOT like watching paint dry. For the record, I have watched paint dry and it's not nearly as exciting as taking yarn and pointy sticks, or hooks, and creating something wonderful. Seriously. Even knitting something hideous is way more fun than most non-knitters seem to think it is. I don't knit because I'm old and don't have any other options like wild sex or sky diving. I knit because I love the feel of yarn through my fingers; because I love taking a big ball of string and turning it into this; because I can't NOT knit.

I'm not into proselytizing. When a non-knitter friend or acquaintance doesn't get excited over something I've made or has zero interest in my blog, I don't try to force them into the Enlightenment that is Knitting. If you are meant to know The Way of the Wool, it will happen. But say I tell you I have some photos you might be interested in and that they might be on my blog later, how about not rolling your eyes and asking me to email them to you instead. This kind of thing gets your name permanently engraved on my "I Won't Even Knit This Person a Rope to Climb Out of a Burning Building" list.

Some day I will be too old or too blind or senile to knit. (I hope I don't miss it. I imagine that would be like missing my very best friend forever.) I'm sure it won't happen for a long, long time and I've got the yarn stash to back up my optimism. But if I'm in The Home and you're the one who has to listen to me tell you, for the 47th time that day that I used to knit and blog about it, or that I used to party with the Yarn Harlot, or that I worked with Donna Druchunas, please just smile and nod your head. Otherwise, I've got one word for you--bedpan. Enough said.


  1. Ooh, someone's a little cranky. I like it.
    I don't understand why people can't appreciate that we all have different interests.
    hellooo, isn't that what makes the world a fun place to be?
    Don't you just want to say, "I don't disparage your hobbies, why are you dissing mine?"
    Or, more your style, get them to tell you about theirs and then laugh or yawn. ha!

  2. I Won't Even Knit This Person a Rope to Climb Out of a Burning Building...

    Just the other day I was wondering when and where the next "my favorite quotes" for my blog would arrive. Winner winner chicken dinner! Now youll have two there!

    Also. Knitting is not crocheting and if you watch me knit and proceed to tell me that you also used to crochet then I know you're a liar liar pants on fire.

  3. amen!

    I love this too: "I Won't Even Knit This Person a Rope to Climb Out of a Burning Building.


    "The Way of the Wool". Yes!

  4. I just hate it when I say the word "knit" and their eyes glaze over and they make no attempt to hide it. Like I said I collect belly button lint or something.

    No, I would never laugh at anybody's interests unless they said they were stand-up comedians or something. I've gotten my fill of disrespect for my art. As bitchy as I am at times, I wouldn't do the same. HOWEVER. I might be tempted to say something like, "It's a pretty complicated craft, requiring dexterity and concentration. I can see why it wouldn't interest you." Oh snap!

  5. OH SNAP!!

    I usually don't get the eye-rolling reaction.
    this weekend actually i was talking to a guy whose hobby is wood & carving, all I said was 'I like yarn' and he was all 'right on!'

    i still think you're awesome :) also, my cousins' grandma is blind and can't hear but she can sure pump out knit mittens!!

  6. Great blog! May I use your comeback? I love it! Now I know what to say when I get the eye-roll..."it's a pretty complicated craft..."

  7. Oh snap indeed, I think I'm going to have to steal that comeback as well. And I'm pretty sure with enough dedication, you can never be too blind to knit. My great-grandmother went blind and was still crocheting up until she died, king size blankets with really intricate stitch patterns that she did all by memory and touch. There's mistakes in it, but you have to know what you're looking for, otherwise it's perfectly gorgeous. If she can do, we all can.

  8. I don't knit. I read you because of your way with words - your wit, charm and sometimes snarkiness - lures me in. You're a pleasure to follow.

  9. We need to be in the old ladies' home together. Then we can listen to each other stories and nod because WE understand. ;-)

    I'll push your rocker, if you push mine.

  10. AWWW. THE WAY OF THE WOOL., love the term!

  11. You said it! And I love "the way of the wool." I think my friend will find it, she just needs some guidance. Other than that, if I didn't have Ravelry, I'd bore my friends stupid about it, but since I do, I think most don't even know I knit...

  12. Jelli, you have outdone yourself on this one. I expect to be knitting long after my mind has failed me on everything else -- I will be at the rest home writing the same poem over & over again, with breaks for miles and miles of garter stitch.

    I'm very selective about which of my "real life" friends gets invited to my blog (and so far NONE of my extended family make the cut) but one friend did comment after reading -- "It's very nice, but there's a LOT of knitting, isn't there?" Clearly she's not found The Way of the Wool yet.

  13. When I am teaching a knitting class, there is a big AH HA! moment each student has, and then the entire class goes quiet as they get completely lost in the moves. Here is where I feel all ZEN inside, and I say, "Ladies, we are sitting here tying knots in strings with sticks. Why on EARTH is this SOO FUN??" They all laugh, agree, and continue. Because now that they have felt it, they GET IT.


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